Discipline is difficult for me. And God is far away from me. I’ve come to wonder if I was only kidding
myself, tricking myself to live an imaginary world. Maybe I thought that working
in a Christian clinic would suffice my Christian needs and that my vision of the world surrounding would
be painted pearly Christian white, and effortlessly I’d see the beauty in all
the dirt around me (and all the things that tend to make the face frown and
nose cringe). Reality strikes hard when
you realize that you romanticize too much.
And I was trapped in such a web.
So maybe I should unwind some thoughts............. ...........................................throw out the useless ones.